All I did at age 21 was play baseball, surf, and hang out with my friends. I wasn’t going to Church very often and I was on my way to Hawaii to finish my college baseball career…or to the minors to take my shot at the big leagues. My life was filled with one fun adventure after another. From San Diego to LA, I had the coast covered. I couldn’t have dreamed up a better situation at age 21. There was just one issue though. After all was said and done for the day, and I’d lay my head down on my pillow at night…all I felt was emptiness. What the heck?
Exactly one night before the baseball season started, I was laying in bed and couldn’t go to sleep. During that night I had a spiritual experience that would be hard for me to describe here in this blog. What I can tell you though is that as a result of that experience, I learned that “you cannot do wrong and feel right”. (Benson) I learned that “God will feel after you and he will take hold of you and wrench your very heart strings.” (JoD) And most of all I learned that what Paul stated in Acts 17:27-29 is true….that I am a son of God, and that He is “not far from any one of us,” especially when the nights are the darkest.
[Tweet “”He is ‘not far from any one of us,’ especially when the nights are the darkest””]As a result of that experience, I decided I would try and go to church a couple times. I was as raw and unpolished as they come at that point. Can you believe I would go to Del Taco on Sunday, and actually sneak burritos into Church? I wasn’t quite as bad as an Alma or a Paul in their heyday, but sometimes I look back at myself and wonder, “who was that guy?”
It was hard for me to go to Church. I didn’t feel good about myself and I was friendless. No familiar faces among a sea of strangers. I went to the Newport singles ward. Didn’t really talk to anyone and left. Then I went to the Huntington Beach ward. Again…didn’t really talk to anyone and left. I’m not really the type that likes to go into a room where I don’t know anyone, but I knew I needed to be in Church and deep down I wanted to go on a mission. Going to sacrament and then grabbing my surfboard just wasn’t cutting it…so I decided I’d try to last the entire 3 hours! I still remember the first day I stayed for the whole block as if it were yesterday. I was sitting in third hour wondering how I made it so long. No one had talked to me and I thought I was too cool to reach out to anyone else. (Yeah… I was an idiot) I don’t know what would have happened during the following week. I may have never came back…but…
Out of the blue, a guy I had never seen before came and sat next to me. “Hey…my name’s Jevin” he said with a big grin on his face as he extended his hand. I hesitantly shook his hand and said, “…hey man, I’m Greg.” Before I knew it, Jevin had 
me talking as if we were great buds. After the class was over he says to me, “Hey Greg…you want to grab some dinner with us?” Sounded good to me. It wasn’t some Mormon “fellowship” obligation deal that ended with the last amen for the day. It was a genuine attempt to make a friend out of someone that looked really lonely. So we walked out into the foyer and he introduced me to about 20 people. The last person that he introduced me to that day happened to be a girl… and she was a 10. (more to come on that later…) I didn’t realize it…but he was one of the coolest dudes in the ward. This guy didn’t need any more friends, and he certainly didn’t need to talk to me, but he went out of his way to do just that. It was Jevin’s character than enabled him to be an instrument in the hands of God on my behalf at that time. “Character is how you treat people that can do nothing for you.” (Goethe) There was absolutely nothing I could do for Jevin when he befriended me.
Spencer W. Kimball once said that “God does notice us, and he watches over us. But it is usually through another person that he meets our needs.”
There is no way I could have known then just how significant this little tiny experience was with Jevin. When I look back on the events that transpired, I’m able to see it for the miracle that it is. This much I can tell you. Jevin probably didn’t think twice about it, but I know that he was sent by God himself to “watch over me” and to “meet my needs”. He was 8-10 years my senior. He had no business sitting next to me and introducing himself to me that day. He was a returned missionary…and a cool one. I needed that. Within a few months I moved out of the “baseball house” and in with Jevin. I needed that. I met with the bishop and told him I wanted to go on a mission. He got me on the right track and challenged me to read the Book of Mormon. I needed that. The Book of Mormon, repentance, and prayer helped me feel the power of the atonement. Like Alma, “I cried within my heart: O Jesus, thou Son of God, have mercy on me, who am in the gall of bitterness, and am encircled about by the everlasting chains of death. When I thought this, I could remember my pains no more; yea, I was harrowed up by the memory of my sins no more.” …Oh how I needed that.
I prepared to serve a mission everyday from that time forward. For an entire 8 years prior to that time, I had never shared the gospel with my best friend Brian. Never. After my own conversion, I shared the gospel with him, and before I left on my mission, he was also converted, and was baptized. I can still clearly remember our embrace as we stood there in our wet clothes. I left on a mission and one year later, Brian sold his boat and left on a mission as well at age 23. Check out what Brian wrote me in an email while he was out on his mission: 
When Brian got home from his mission, he married an Idaho girl named Deneese. There is no possible way that this takes place if Brian doesn’t join the Church and go on a mission. Their beautiful kids, Camden and Greyson would never exist. This family…isn’t a family without this string of events. Generations inside and outside of his family would have been deprived of his testimony.
As for me and my family…do you remember that girl I told you Jevin introduced me to that day in the foyer? Yeah…she is sitting next to me right now. Before I left on my mission we were engaged. It’s pretty rare to be engaged on a mission…and just as rare to have someone wait for over 2 years…but here we are.
“By small means, are great things brought to pass.” Forget fellowshipping! Start friendshipping. This one small act of friendship…an extended hand, a smile, and a dinner invitation changed my life, my family’s life, and thousands more that I was able to bear my testimony to. It was the strengthening I needed at a pivotable time in my life and its affects are endless. Imagine if Jevin didn’t come up to me that day. I probably would not have my wife and kids. I might have not followed through to serve a mission. My best friend Brian doesn’t join the church, serve a mission, or marry his wife. You would probably not be reading this blog right now without that one interaction that took place in a church class long ago. I couldn’t imagine my life without those things! I just can’t.
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This is what I want the world to know. All of what I just shared here might not have ever happened if this one random guy had not come up to me to extend his hand. It’s almost as if the clasp of his hand took place as I stood at a spiritual fork in the road. That moment in time was God’s way of giving me an opportunity to live up to the potential and foreordination I had before I came to this earth.
So…next time you see someone sitting in church all alone…think of me, and consider what it might mean to that person if you just extended your hand…and offered your friendship.
This is how I met my husband, a hand of friendship. You never know what will come from a simple Hi.
That’s awesome. Thanks for posting this. I remember seeing you at the Newport and Huntington Beach dances before the mish. Good times! I worked with Brian at Ralph’s. Two great guys!
Jevin and his brother Kelly are friends of mine from highschool and great examples. Thanks for sharing and showing the power of one individual in the life of another.
So glad I found your blog and entries. So glad! You remind me so much of me, and thanks to your post, it gives me hope to be a better example and disciple.
Thanks Jim! Thanks a lot!
Thanks for giving me hope. I pray for a “Jevin” for my son who has followed that fork in the road a bit too far. I enjoy your insight and encouraging words.
Likewise, Greg, I am enjoying your blog posts. I am from HI, now living in Utah and find that we have similar life experiences. I appreciate my membership in the Latter Day Saint Church of Jesus Christ.
Somehow I stumbled onto your blog, and my take away from this post is likely different than most, but I thank you. It has been encouraging to me, as I pray daily for my less active ERM son (served 7 mos at age 19) who is an awesome person like you, but still “floating” spiritually and in getting on with his life at age 22. He lives in a bachelor pad with other less actives or non members, hangs with them on the weekends, which involves some commandment breaking activities, works very hard at a manual labor job, 40-50 hours a week, gives service as he can, etc. His life isn’t all fun and games like you described, but he says he’s happy. Deep down he really can’t be happy and the emptiness you described has got to be there. Says life is just about “being a good person” and he is, so he doesn’t need religion. I pray every day that he may have a spiritual experience for a change of heart like you did and have a desire to embrace the gospel again. I pray every day that people will be placed in his path to help him. That someone will come along and be his “Jevin”. I have faith that it will happen in time, and I know the Lord is watchful. May we all take the opportunity to reach out, as you described. Thanks for sharing your experience.
Keep praying! It will happen. My prayers are with you…
My question is: Did you tell Jevin what he did for you? I’m sure you probably did and I’m sure he was blessed for his “friendshipping”. I, like many, hope for this for both of my son’s. It was hurtful to watch the leaders of their Teacher’s quorum push my boys away with their bullying and teasing so that they could “be cool leaders”. Had they extended a hand of friendship I believe both of my boys would have stayed active and went on missions. Someday I pray that someone will help lift them back into the Gospel rather than push them away. Thank you for your story and giving the rest of us hope.
Love your story! I pray daily how I might be able to be an instrument in the Lord’s hands each day of my life. What a great example you have here of how important it is for us to be open & willing to reach out when prompted by the Holy Ghost to offer a smile, a sincere hand of friendship & unconditional love to those we come in touch with daily. It’s who we are & what we are expected to be in this life. Thank you for your beautifully written articles.
Thank you for your encouragement!
Thanks for sharing, if you don’t mind I’d love to share your story with the YW in my ward who are very resistant to accept new or less active YW. This is just what they need to see why being NICE matters.
Yes! Share away! Help them see what one little gesture will do!
I have been following your blog since last December after a friend shared on Facebook one of your posts. Little did I know, just a few short weeks later, I would move from Utah into your parents ward and one of the first people I would meet would be Deneese. She has been a great example and teacher for my little boy in primary. The power of Jevin’s kindness has spread to touch my life personally. Thank you for sharing this!
Thanks! Yeah Deneese is awesome!
I’m normally pretty tough on you when I comment, but this post is excellent. Well done. Thanks for sharing.
LOVED this article! Have to share though, I was apparently reading too fast and when I read he introduced you to a girl who was a 10. I thought it said a girl who WAS 10 (as in years old). I was really confused and tried to do the math about how you were engaged to a 10 year old.. then I re-read it and felt much better. 🙂 Made myself laugh.
Glad it all worked out for you!
Wow – an awesome “power of everyday missionaries” story! Love to hear them, thank you for sharing yours! Kristin
This was beautiful. Thank you! (No response required.)
wow! glad i read this!! thank you, greg 🙂